Saturday, November 15, 2014

等我們老了


1、等我們老了,Facebook status會不會這樣寫:今天是老張的葬禮,老李的在下週一。

2、最近喜歡聽周小倫的歌,其中有一首還是他爺爺周杰倫的曲。

3、開著我那輛燒汽油的蘭博基尼去接孫子放學,被交警再次警告城區內禁止汽油車上路。

4、心臟病犯了去住院,護士竟是高中同学的孫女。

5、又是生日,兒子送了我一部 iPhone 50,可我覺得還是沒iPhone 5好看。

6、跟老王出去逛街,看到巨幅的網絡遊戲廣告,他說他很懷戀四五十年前的魔獸世界。

7、看著Facebook,翻了翻這六十年的動態,好多好友的頭像都不會再亮了……

8、正在給孩子講自己年輕時的驕傲事蹟,突然想哭,因為這個場景也在自己兒時出現過。

9、早起的陽光依舊溫暖,我還會習慣的轉過身想叫你起來曬太陽,可是轉身停住沉默,居然你不在好多年我依然沒習慣。


Sunday, October 26, 2014

HAppY WorkinG

1、办公室里只有两种人,主角和龙套。
  职场上,想要过的轻松,不想往上爬,那就只能做一辈子的龙套。作龙套的坏处就是:送死你先去,功劳全没有,裁员先考虑。现在的职场绝不是养懒人的地方,你要比别人生存的好,就唯有当主角,让别人去做龙套。你不能踩着别人肩膀,就只能做他人垫背。
  2、每个人都要有大志,就算要毁灭世界也可以。
  胸怀大志是做主角的首要条件。在职场上,你若没有一个奋斗目标,就不可能进取的往上爬,到最后只能沦为龙套,成为别人的牺牲品。所以不管毁灭世界,还是成为第一首富,你都必须心存志向,以此为目标。
  3、别被理想忽悠,理想是需要的,但不是别人的理想,而是你自己的。
  当提起大志时,有人会想到企业目标,想到企业文化,想到老板慷慨激昂的演说。忘了那些吧,老板的理想只是老板的,而职场上,你是独立的。要保持清醒头脑,不能被轻易忽悠。不管别人有什么理想,要牢牢记住自己的大志,这才是立命之根本。
  4、如果真的没大志,那就为钱奋斗。
  每个人都有解甲归田的时候,如果不是为了钱,谁要当这个官呢。所以赚钱是人最主要的追求。职场上很危险的局面,就是老板用理想笼络人,想让人不拿钱白干活。但真的肯不要钱干活,那你就是没价值的,既然没价值,还有什么存在的必要呢?金钱是唯一衡量你价值的东西。你真的一无所求的话,那就为赚钱而奋斗。
  5、你可以不聪明,但不可以不小心。
  职场与此一样,你可以不聪明,但不可以不小心。不聪明的人,最多笨拙一些,事情做的差一些。而在职场上,这不是很大的罪过。但不小心就随时会触犯到别人的利益,犯下得罪人这个职场大忌。到那时,穿小鞋都不晓得是为什么穿的。管牢嘴,能风花雪月的时候就少议论同事,能说人好话时就别说坏话。
  6、你说的每句话,老板都会知道。所以要好好想想该说什么,不该说什么。
  别奢望你私下说的话老板就听不到。老板能知道一切,这是真理。在职场上完全相同,只要你不是一个人自言自语,就得担心谈话对象会把话传出去。而经验告诉我们,每一句对公司的议论,最后都会传到老板耳朵里。所以你跟任何人说话时,都要好好想想,该说什么,不该说什么。不该说的绝对不能说,可说可不说的也闭嘴。
  7、偶尔对老板交心是必要的,但要有的放矢。
  记住,促膝长谈是种手段,而不是真的让你什么都说。偶尔的交心,说些无关紧要的私己话,能让老板觉着你贴心。而事实上,从没一个上司会对你真的交心。切忌一热泪盈眶,就把心窝子都交出去。被出卖的,永远是交心的那个。
  8、不管什么时候,装傻总是最不易犯错。
  金庸也曾经说过,他年迈耳背后,该听见的话就能听见,不该听见的话就听不见。当有人要你当面表态站队,要你选择事情的方向,不管你怎么选都是错的。那么装傻就是最好的选择,这是没选择时最不易犯错的方法。别担心装傻的样子很拙劣,即使每个人都看出你在装傻,可他们依旧拿你没办法。真正倒霉的是那些明确表态的人,有这些龙套牺牲,怎么也轮不到你。
  9、把自己当成最聪明的人,往往是最笨的。
  在职场上,总把自己当最聪明的人,一定是做龙套的命。真正聪明的高手,是大智若愚,该精明时精明,不该精明时装傻。
  10、一定要有靠山,但比靠山还可靠的,是让自己有价值。
  所以在职场中,和上司们搞好关系是一门必须的功课,为自己找好靠山很重要。而比此更重要的,是让自己有足够的价值,以致于每个上司都必须拉拢你。
  11、你是上司的人,上司却不一定是你的人,这层意思一定要明白。
  当一个上司对你说,你是他的人时,心里一定要清楚,上司并不是你的人。你是他的,他是他自己的。当你的事情与上司的利益有**时,他们会毫不犹豫的出卖你。无论何时都要记住,你是你自己的,只有你才能对自己负责。别相信上司故作亲近的话,那随时都会是陷阱。
  12、上司说他对你很放心,事实可能正好相反。
  如果上司真的对你放心,他根本不用经常提及。真正的信任,是通过行动表现的。当上司愿意把害人的事情,把职场斗争的事情和你一起做,那才是信任的表现。而上司口头说对你放心,则反而要当心了,很可能你做了什么,让上司产生你不忠的怀疑。
  13、站在上司立场上想问题,站在自己立场上办事情。
  当上司相信你,让你做一些事情时,心里必须要有本帐,别傻兮兮的什么都做。你要站在上司立场上去考虑问题,了解上司为什么要做,能达到什么目的。然后再以自己的立场抉择,有些做,有些推脱。就算是象余则成这样看似对站长忠心耿耿的人,也不是什么都会做的。选择符合自己利益的事情去做,不符合利益的想法推搪。用做了的事情取悦上司,而不做的事情则让上司知道,你已经完全尽力了。
  14、上司突然垮台,不要惊慌,独自完成任务,然后借此再找到新的靠山。
  在职场里,经常发生上司突然垮台的事情。如果你不幸遇见,千万别惊慌,独自完成手上的工作,而且要做的漂亮精彩。而这就是你将来安身立命的资本,你可以借此找到新的靠山。还是那句话,必须要让自己有价值,这比有人罩着你还重要。
  15、做事做的好,干活干到老。
  “做事做的好,干活干到老”和“让自己有价值”这两句话间并没有矛盾。价值是体现在关键处,是一个至关重要的地方才要突然爆发的。而无关痛痒时,尤其是做些没功劳只有苦劳的活,别做太好。永远干得好,就会一直干下去。若让人觉得,你只有做庸碌工作的才能,就算干到累死,你也没有爬上去的那一天。
  16、一定要有缺点。
  在职场,一定要有缺点,一个完美而毫无缺点的人,会遭人嫉恨,会被人敬而远之。如果连上司都对你敬而远之,那职场之路就危险了。所以聪明人会故意暴露些缺点,尤其是无关痛痒的缺点,让上司以为他能拿捏住你,那才是最安全的境地。但缺点绝不可致命,却不能是你真正的短处,只可以是风花雪月时谈起的余兴节目,和人套近乎有余,想以此要挟则没门。
  17、高你半级的人,往往是最危险的,同级的是天然敌人。
  如果已经有一官半职,那对这句一定感同身受。因为高你半级的人会有危机感,怕你随时都可能与他们平起平坐,所以有机会他们就会打击你。而不管高半级还是一级,都是上司,他们给你穿小鞋就危险万分了。而同级的人是必然的敌人,只要你们的上司不是傻瓜,就一定会挑拨手下争斗。
  18、十句里要有九句真话,这样说一句假话才有人信。
  职场中,九真一假也是最佳法则。一个满嘴跑火车的人是得不到上司信任的,只有忠心耿耿,几乎不说谎的人,才能够在最关键的时刻骗到所有人。你要当老实人,老实人才能取信于人,没有别人的信任就没有关键时的谎言。说谎只需要在最最关键的时刻,能少说一句就少说一句。狼来了的故事,大家都应该听过。
  19、把每个慌话都当成性命攸关,这样说谎就不会内疚。
  职场上很关键的难关,就是怎么过自己心理关口。有些人天生不会说谎,一说谎就内疚。这时候,就需要想起你的大志了。当一个人有志向,有理想,有信仰的时候,他就可以做任何事情。余则成为了完成任务说过谎,杀过人,也做过很多坏事。这完全因为他有信仰在支撑,所以并不会内疚。而你也要记住,每个谎言都可能是性命攸关,如果过不了自己的心,就可能实现不了自己的理想。如果这么想了,你还会内疚么?
  20、每个人都站在恶的那一面,因为各人有各人的善。
  最后讲一句关于理想的道理。每个人都有自己的理想,而有利于自己理想的则是善,不利于别人理想的则是恶。因人们各有各的立场,有不同的需求。所以在别人眼里,你必然站在恶的那面。你永远都是自己的善,别人的恶。但怎么样才是真正的大善,怎么样才是大恶呢?为实现理想说一句谎,这是恶,但不是大恶。而如果你的理想是毁灭世界,那才是大恶。譬如你以事业红火,同事幸福为理想,那么就算为这个理想做了坏事,也不过小恶。行大善而为小恶,历来被圣人们不齿。可圣人自己也这么做。如此的圣人可以从孔子、孟子、王阳明一直排到更近更近。儒教里有知行合一的法门,就是要你明白,只要理想大善,便可无所不为。然而,你必须真的确信自己的志向是善的。

Wednesday, May 21, 2014

Top 10 Ways to Make Your Boss Love You

Unless you're lucky enough to work for yourself, we all have a boss we have to answer to. Provided they're not the devil incarnate, there are quite a few ways to ensure you two have a good relationship. Here's what you should keep in mind.

10. Boost Your Likability at Work

Now we're not implying you aren't already likable — you're a nice guy/girl, right? (Most) everybody in the office probably likes you. But you can use a few tricks to make yourself even more likable to those around you, including your boss. That means avoiding negative body language, picking your battles, and even dressing the part. This doesn't mean you have to be a suck up!! — Just keep in mind that you want to give off more positive signals than negative ones. That way, you can offer criticism when it counts, but you aren't seen as a negative nancy. 


9. Make Yourself Indispensable

You've probably heard this one a lot, and it's totally true: if the office can't function without you, then you're in a much better position to get bigger raises, promotions, and avoid layoffs. So if you aren't indispensable yet, start working toward it: work on high-visibility projects, and if you can, gain some skills that separate you from the crowd—and help projects run more smoothly. A bit of extra training never hurt anyone.



8. Know Their Priorities

If it's important to your boss, make it important to you. So make sure you talk to them regularly to get a feel for what their priorities are. They don't have to match up perfectly with your priorities, necessarily, but make sure you're giving enough attention to the stuff they want done. It'll keep a bad boss off your back, and make a good boss like you even more.

7. Keep Them Updated

It goes without saying that face time is important—after all, your boss won't love you if they never see you—but in particular, try to keep them updated with your work as you progress. Consider sending them a regular status update. Not only will this let them know what you're up to, but if you're being productive, it'll also show them how much progress you're making—which makes you look good. This is also known as "managing up," which isn't as manipulative as it sounds. All it means is that you communicate regularly so you're both on the same page, which is particularly useful with busy or uncommunicative bosses.

6. Fix Your Problems Before They Do

Nobody's perfect, and your boss probably understands that. But if you can fix your problems before they have to, you'll look lot better in their eyes. The best way to do this is with a regular self-review — keep an informal work diary. Write down what you're doing, what others think you do, and what you should be doing — then review yourself from your boss' perspective. With honesty (and a little bit of luck), you should have a good idea of what problems you need to squash before your boss even comes to you about them.

5. Apologize (Correctly) When You Screw Up

For the issues you can't fix ahead of time—or for the one-time screwups that just happen—you just need to recover gracefully. And that means apologizing—correctly. Make your boss (the wronged party) the focus of your apology, not yourself. Again, think about what their priorities are, and how this impacted them—not you. And remember: don't stress out when you fail. It's how you get better.    

4. Command Respect

To get your bosses love — and not hate yourself — is to command real respect. That means putting out solid work, avoiding office politics and gossip, and being able to accept criticism when it's given. If you respect yourself, your boss and co-workers will generally respect you too. 





3. Master the Art of Looking Busy

The best way to get ahead is to be just a tiny bit evil. Ha!! That doesn't mean slacking off on the job, or outright lying. It just means ensuring your boss knows that you have a lot on your plate. So always have something you're "working on" when they ask, keep them updated on your progress, and use Scotty's Principle: pad your estimates for how long it takes to do things by about 25%. It ensures you'll never get bogged down or turn in anything late — and if you deliver ahead of schedule occasionally, you'll even come out looking good.

2. Give Honest (but Useful) Feedback

If you truly have a good boss, they're okay with honest feedback. But when they ask for it (or when you're given a chance to review them), don't just start rattling off complaints. Figure out what kind of feedback they're actually looking for, and give it to them. That doesn't mean telling them what they want to hear ("You're the best boss ever!"), and don't start offering unsolicited feedback on their long lunches or regular tardiness.

1. Do Your Best to Work Together, Even If You Hate Them

Of course, no matter what you do, some bosses will forever be horrible. If you're in that situation, we feel your pain, and we're sorry. While the rest of these tips will only go so far, the best thing you can do is grow a thick skin, keep a log of their craziness, and most importantly — don't let it infect the rest of your life. (You should probably also make sure you're not the problem). If you can make working with them bearable, consider it a win.


Tuesday, May 20, 2014

你的旅行是「增強人生厚度」還是「移動身體」

一位來自法國的旅人。那時他已經在亞洲旅行了半年,香港、新加坡、日本、越南、寮國、柬埔寨……每個地方都待上個十來天,通常也沒有安排規劃。他享受漫無目的的感覺,感覺膩了就換一個國家。這些聽在我耳裡近乎「夢幻」的旅人生活,讓我不禁興奮又羨慕,但是他的一番言論卻點醒了我:

「其實你不用羨慕我,像你這樣拼命工作後出來旅行才是好的。當你旅行久了就會發現,如果人生沒有目標或是正在努力進行的工作,它其實非常乏味。看來看去不是人文景觀就是自然景觀,你只是例行性的移動自己的身體、穿梭在不同地方罷了。」

一、旅行的基本特質是讓人身處「異地」,加速「反思」的進行。

當我們提到旅行時,直覺是「到一個自己不熟悉的地方」。身處異地的時候,很多事情我們不能當作理所當然,這加速了我們腦袋中「比較系統」的運作,會自然而然地去想:這跟我原本的生活有什麼不同嗎?

所謂的「異地」並非一定指的是「地點的相異」,就像大部分的人以為旅行一定要出國,但是其實只要讓自己體會和平常生命經驗中「不一樣」的事情、做不一樣的嘗試,都可以是一種「置身地」。譬如說登山或是上教堂、偶爾跑到青年旅舍去住、吃自己本來討厭的東西、穿背心上街等等……食、衣、住、行、育、樂,有很多不同的方法可以讓我們「身處異地」。

例如在印度的時候,想要叫車卻非常無奈,因為練了十幾年的英文,不論是聽力或口說,在獨特的「印式英語」面前都無用武之地。原來在自己的国家每天上下班那麼的容易方便,既沒有漫飛的塵土、凹凸不平的路,也沒有雞同鴨講的司機與蠻橫無理的乘客,好不幸福。

另一個角度來說這經驗也可以是有趣的,至少我也沒想過在上班或前往一個目的地的路上,可以充滿荊棘與挑戰;反觀自己在家鄉的生活,好像每一件事情都有美好的規律,每一件事情都應該依照某種期待去運行,很難有超越期待的驚喜發生。

二、「反思」是為了「改變」,為了推進生命的「前進」

身處異地讓很多的比較可以發生,我們可以選擇只是讓它閃過腦袋,或是積極的思考:從這些比較中我發現了什麼?這些發現有助於我改變現狀嗎?

當我們回答這問題時,「反思」就發生了。我們通常在想要改變的時候才會反思,所以我覺得旅行不該是例行性的公事,應該是在一個人想要「改變」現狀的時候發生,或著是應該要在旅行的時候尋找一些可以讓自己變的更好的線索。如此一來旅行就很難乏味,每一次的旅行都可以積極推進我們的生命去「前進」。

三、旅行 X 工作 X 生活 = 生命的廣度 X 深度 X 厚度

根據上述兩點推論,在「異地反思」前若沒有豐富的工作或生活,可能就沒有太多感受與經驗可以去做連結,反思就比較難以進行,也比較難有意想不到的收穫。

那些平時在原地認真工作、生活的人們,平時靠工作累積了豐富的「深度」,因生活琢磨了足夠的「廣度」,當旅行所帶來的異地反思發生時,所見所聞就有很多再詮釋的空間,也會因為連結而產生很多靈感與想像。這樣的反思搭配原本累積的深廣度,讓生命更加豐富。我喜歡用增強了「生命的厚度」來形容,這種生命厚度不會消失,也難以被取代。

對於那些工作、生活一成不變的人,缺乏生命的深度與廣度,「異地反思」為其生命注入了新的刺激與可能性。回到原地時,讓人有了一個動機,透過工作與生活的調整重新打造自己的「三維生命面向」。

最慘的就是那些「為了旅行而旅行」的人,在美麗的異地流連時卻被「盲目的旅行」蒙蔽,好像一定要在有限的時間內把行程塞到最滿;或是找一間像樣的紀念品店,殺它個片甲不留。換來的是類似「我曾經去過……」的表面戰功,沒有類似「那趟旅行讓我發現……」或是「那趟旅行後我下定決心……」之類的生命反思,這種行為就好像「原地踏步」一樣,相當可惜!

最後我想跟大家分享三個我覺得很好的旅行型態和旅人態度:

大旅行:對工作和生活極度不滿意的時候,你應該給自己一段時間的逃跑(至少一個月),逃到一個對你來說非常不能理解的「異地」,給自己一個承諾,希望透過異地反思獲得一個新的生命態度。回到「原地」時,用新的態度去面對舊的環境,抑或是換一個新的環境。
旅人態度:這一趟旅程結束後,生命一定要改變

中旅行:工作、生活過得去,但是慢慢感覺到無聊、一成不變,這時候需要大概「一個周末」的短期逃跑,這會讓我們的工作、生活恢復彈性。
旅人態度:我需要充電,讓原本的生活更多采多姿

小旅行:平常就很懂得享受工作、生活的人,隨時隨地都在做新的嘗試,每天都在累積生命的廣度、深度、厚度,新的一天就是一場新的小旅行。
旅人態度:我是生命的旅人,無時無刻都在嘗試、反思、享受,累積生命的面向。


想要什麼樣的旅行,擁抱什麼樣的旅人態度,決定權都在我們自己身上。
享受吧,讓我們一起做生命的旅人。





The Smart Creative's Guide to Dressing for Work by Christian Jarrett

With designer labels and high heels, we’ve come a long way since clothing was about nothing more than modesty and warmth. And yet, for many of us, what we wear for work has become automatic and habitual. We drag on a suit each day, out of routine, nothing more. Or we slouch about in baggy casual gear because we’re freelance, or working remotely, so we can.

By dressing mindlessly like this we’re ignoring the large amount of evidence showing the profound effect of clothing on our thinking style, on how we feel, and on the way others perceive us. Starting today, you can use clothing and props to improve your work performance through these simple steps:

Dress for the task: the “Lab Coat” effect
Consider the findings of a study published last year by the Kellogg School of Management. They showed that students were far more accurate on tests of attentional focus and sustained concentration while wearing the white lab coat of a scientist. Crucially, spending time thinking about the lab coat didn’t have this benefit, it had to be worn.

These results suggest that donning symbolic apparel can alter our thinking style in beneficial ways that are consistent with the meaning that the clothing holds for us. So whatever project you’re currently working on, consider dressing for that role. Think what clothing symbolizes the attributes you need to succeed and wear those threads while you work. If there’s nothing as obvious as a lab coat, why not look to role models in your field and see what they wear – perhaps something flamboyant for when you want to be creative, a shirt and tie for when you’re working on the accounts. The important thing is that the clothing has the right symbolic meaning for the work you’re doing. In the study, the white coat had no attentional benefits when the students thought it was a painter’s jacket, not a scientist’s coat.

Be yourself and respect your own style
As well as affecting our mindset, our clothes can also alter how we feel about ourselves. U.S. research published in 2007 found that employees described themselves as feeling more productive, trustworthy, and authoritative when they were wore a business suit at work, but more friendly when wearing casual clothes.

An important detail here was the employees’ style preferences. It was smart types with a clear preference for wearing formal work attire whose feelings of productivity were most adversely affected when they’d worked in an office with a casual dress code. On the other hand, it was hipster staff with a strong preference for laid-back wear who felt most strongly that suits hampered their friendliness and creativity. Of course not all work places give you the freedom to choose, but if you can, these findings show it pays to respect your own style.

Choose your weapons (and accessories) wisely
The psychological effects of clothing on performance extend to tools and props. A 2011 study led by Charles Lee at the University of Virginia showed that university students perceived a putting hole to be larger (thus making more putts) when they used a putter that they thought belonged to the pro player Ben Curtis, as compared with a standard putter

Whether it’s a lucky pen handed down from a mentor, or a mouse-mat from your first successful product launch, the symbolic power of the objects we work with is more than mere superstition or sentimentality. Their meaning can alter our mindset and improve our performance. The same principles also apply when choosing what to wear – that lucky tie or necklace really could give you an edge at an interview.

Dress to impress
If you want to appear authoritative it really does make sense to dress smart. A raft of studies have shown that people in more formal attire get served more quickly in shops, have more luck soliciting charity donations, and are usually judged to be more intelligent and academic. A study that looked specifically at female applicants for a managerial job found those who dressed in a smart masculine style were perceived as more forceful and aggressive and were more likely to get hired.

If you can, pay attention to detail. Research published this year using faceless photographs, found that a man dressed in a bespoke suit was rated as more confident, successful, and flexible than a man dressed in an off-the-rack suit. “Minor clothing manipulations can give rise to significantly different inferences,” the researchers said.

This suggests it could be worth going the extra mile when dressing yourself for an important meeting or interview. The same principles also apply when it comes to group image. A survey in 2009 found that business students rated companies with a formal dress code as more authoritative and competent, while those with a more relaxed approach, were seen as more friendly and creative. So if you’re a manager in charge of your organization’s dress code, think about the kind of image you’d like to cultivate. Which leads to the final point …

Consider your audience
Formal suits aren’t always the way to go. Research shows that people who wear more daring outfits are perceived as more attractive and individual, which could be advantageous in more creative industries. Casual dress can also be more persuasive, depending on your audience. In 2010, a female experimenter reported that students were far more diligent in following her detailed instructions when she was dressed casually (like they were), as opposed to smart and professional. This similarity effect echoes a study conducted in the early 80s in which experimenters sought a dime for a telephone call. Smartly dressed researchers had more luck at an airport, where more people were dressed formally; casually dressed researchers had more luck at a bus station.

If you need to be persuasive at work, the lesson from these studies is that there’s no single rule for how to dress. You need to balance the power of authority, which you get from smartness, against the allure of camaraderie, which comes from dressing like your audience, and may require going more casual.

The next time you’re getting dressed for work in the morning, be mindful of the psychological impact that clothes can have. Your choice could literally affect your mindset, so try to match your outfit to the type of work you’re planning to do. If interacting with other people is on the cards – consider who they are, the impression you want to make, and especially whether you want to impress them or be one of them. A polished professional look can certainly give you authority. But if you’re collaborating with quirky creatives, or you want to cultivate a friendly atmosphere, you may find it’s advantageous to adopt a more casual, individual style for the day.


Friday, May 16, 2014

To MYSELF

        1、订目标,达目标

  一个没有目标的人,就好比大海中航行的船只没有指南针的指引,永远靠不了岸。学会每年、每月、每周、每天给自己制定一个切实可行的目标,并尽自己最大的努力去实现,天天坚持着做,一年后,三年后,五年后,你将会积累一个大大的、成功的目标,并自己为之骄傲。


  2、尽可能多的帮助他人成功

  帮助一个人,需要有付出的心态,需要有爱心,当然也需要有助人的能力。社交的本质就是不断用各种形式帮助其它人成功。共享你的知识与资源、时间与精力、友情与关爱,从而持续为他人提供价值,一定要记得:帮助他人其实是在帮自己。你将会获得更多的快乐、友谊、朋友、关爱和宽容。


  3、不停息地编织人际关系网

  人际关系同样是生产力,更是快乐的源泉。因此,为了拥有更宽广、更具层次的人际关系。自己要给自己列人际关系打造计划。比如:领导圈、运动圈、音乐圈、时尚圈、管理圈、美食圈、旅游圈等等,各种不同的圈子里都要有1-2个自己最知心、最了解、最和谐的朋友,因此,不管你遇到什么困难,要办什么事情,都有圈子里的朋友能帮助你。


  4、定期与朋友沟通,联络感情

  朋友不是在要利用他时,才想起。因此,编织好自己的人际圈子,并不断扩大的同时,定期与自己圈子里的朋友保持联系。比如:常打打球,看电影,喝咖啡,吃饭,结伴旅行,沟通聊天,做有益的事情。常来常往,朋友才会感情更深厚。


  5、勇敢和自信

  一个成功的人,一定是一个勇敢的人,自信的人。具有勇敢和自信品格,一定会使你在职场攻无不克,战无不胜,创造神奇。所以,要不断修炼你的自信心和勇气,使自己在做事的时候,在创业的时候,更能把握机会,创造成功。


  6、尊重他人

  人与人之间是平等的,没有职务高低之别,没有钱多钱少之分,高低贵贱人格平等。因此,一个时常能尊重他人的人,一定能赢得他人的尊重。切记勿居高临下,目中无人,谦虚的心怀是人际的通行证。


  7、凡事100%准备

  成功是属于有准备的人,做任何事,见任何人之前,都要做足充分的准备。准备好你的心态,准备好你的时间,准备好你的精力,资料,知识,这样你将会获得更有准备的成功。


  8、养成列清单习惯

  对每天的工作,重要的事情,约见的客户,一定要按时间、轻重缓急顺序列一个清单,并在计划的时间内去完成,养成做事有条理、专注、坚持的好习惯。


  9、坚持每天看书30分钟

  书中自有黄金屋,坚持读书,读精品书,并能静下来思考,不断扩充知识面,提升见识,做到每天点点滴滴积累,就会有朝一日获得一日千里的长进。


  10、学会分享

  做一个善分享的人。你的心得、才华、能力、经验、感知、经济、新闻、意识、激情都要及时向好朋友分享,分享也是提升自己能力的一种成功法宝。


  11、注重工作质量

  做事情,干工作不在于做到多少,更在于做有意义、有价值的工作。因此,平常形成高品质的工作风格,提升自己的工作效率,实际等于在提升工作绩效。


  12、凡事及时跟进

  对上司、朋友、同事、部属、亲友、家人交代过的事,相互知晓过的人和事,都要保持及时跟进,不能没有下文,不了了之;要给对方一个满意交代和回复,才能获得他人的信任。因此,有效跟进也是必备的做事风格。


  13、做人讲诚信,做事讲责任

  平时保持做人的诚信,一言九鼎,兑现承诺,对做不到的事也要告之朋友,并客观说明理由。做任何事都要负起责任,养成负责的习惯,别人同样会对你负责。


  14、每天运动一小时

  生命在于运动。每天做一小时有氧运动,比如晨练,饭后慢跑,或打羽毛球等,活动活动筋络,舒松舒松骨头,使自己的精神更愉悦,身体更健康,健康身体是革命的资本。


  15、每天找一位某方面比自己更厉害的人交流学习

  孔子云:三人行必有我师。多与比自己某方面更厉害的学习、讨教、沟通交流,你将会获得更多的资讯、能力和知识,从而使自己更富有才华。


  16、养成每天朗颂10分钟好习惯,提高语言流利度

  坚持朗颂,会提高自己语言流利程度:一种可以与任何人,在任何情况下都自信沟通的能力。这是许多成功人士的共同特征。因此,每天给自己十分钟,获得更好的表达技能,使自己在公众场合有更自如的表达和沟通。


  17、养成说真心话,做真实人好品格

  真诚是人际沟通的通行证,打破沉默最好的方式就是说心里话。因此,确保自己做事凭良心,讲诚信;讲真话,做实事,这样你会获得更好的人际,更真诚的友谊,别人见到你,同样会回报给你真心和诚意。


  18、保持倾听好习惯

  成功人士,有着良好的沟通技能。而沟通的技能不是在于你有多会说,更要善听。能听懂对方的意图,想法,目的。这样才能更好理解别人,才能被他人理解,才能达成和谐的沟通。


  19、保持专注、专业

  成功的人都是专注的人,都是专业的人。这世界上只有专家才是赢家。简单的事重复地做,就可能成为专家,而重复的事能开心地做就更是专注的赢家。保持专注,提升专业,做人生的赢家。


  20、建立自己的品牌美誉度

  产品要获得消费者的认可必须靠卓越品牌。一个人要获得亲朋好友,上司同事和部属的认可同样靠卓越个人品牌。因此,个人品牌需要经营,良好的个人品牌树立,要让自己每天必须做好四讲:讲诚信、 讲品格、讲礼貌、 讲实话。


  21、谦虚谨慎,不骄不躁

  满招损,谦受益。做人做事谦虚,会获得更好资源,更好理解,更好认同。傲慢是一种病,它会让你忘记真正的朋友,忘记朋友的重要。保持谦虚。帮助其它人和你一起进步,甚至超过你都是谦虚的心怀。


  22、每天保持愉悦平和心态
  人有喜气,脸上必有愉色,愉色生宛容,宛容生和气,和气生财。因此,先解决心情,才能做好事情。好心态,好心情,才会有好人际,好友谊,好的前程。


* unrelated to any marketing products, please do not misuse this phrase.
#unlikemarketing/pyramidscheme/directsales#


Wednesday, May 14, 2014

目标是我一辈子要努力的方向


I only feel happy when I don't think about my past nor my future and when there are no people around.


目标是我一辈子要努力的方向

当时我就困惑,因为从小时候起,好像所有的目标都是好的成绩与读大学,哪来什么理想与目标。我工作了,接触了更多的人与事,也读了更多的书,慢慢发现目标是在你的生命过程中慢慢浮现出来的,是由无数个
你不断自省后给的答案,而且目标这件事情是会随着你的成长和人生的不同阶段发生变化。


计较努力才是真正的失败者心态

害怕选择后的失败,我说你更多是害怕选择努力认真的生活态度。
全力以赴,不找借口的渡过每一天是一种生活态度,
努力了,最终达到目标后发现不是所要的,那又怎样。收获是过程中学习到的经验、能力与信心。你没什么可以失去的!

每段人生都会启示你,
你可以做好什么,你想做什么,
你在哪些活动中可以收获快乐,哪些才能是你的天赋

沒有方向感

通常不問自己為什麼做一件事,
往往是別人做了,我就跟著做,或著是爸媽要我這樣做,
並不昰說不聆聽別人和爸媽的意見,而是我們應該對自己有些期待,
問問自己期待自己三年後五年後是什麼樣子的,跟什麼人在一起、
在什麼樣的環境做什麼樣的工作、過什麼樣的生活,
畢竟要對自己的人生負責的人是自己,
面對太多外在的期待和常規裡要提醒自己常思考為什麼。


我們的青年習慣想很多,做決定時怕不是自己想要的、怕自己會後悔、
怕時間不夠用、怕能力不夠用、怕……
很多事情在沒有嘗試以前是難以想像的  得失心總是很重,
我們老是在看自己失去的,而沒想到犯錯時其實「得到」了改進的建議。


有句話說:「要勇敢跨出我們的舒適圈」
但我认为,应先勇敢找到自己的舒適圈

很多人在很多嘗試之後仍然沒有方向感,一來可能是因為沒有反思的習慣,二來有一個很大的原因是因為「沒有聚焦」:
太多事都想做、什麼都想學、認為自己什麼都該學

人生很長,我們不用急著一時把人生的所有排列組合都列完,
在沒有方向感時聚焦專注在自己「相對擅長的」,
很容易用心投入、建立信心、專精卓越。

我這裡指的舒適圈是自己跟自己比較的時候,比較容易不用花很大心力就上手的工作,或是自己很自然會喜愛、在做的時候都很有動力的事情,
先盡全力磨好自己舒適圈裡的這幾把刀,確認自己在做這幾件事時真的游刃有餘了,屆時自己已有上人生戰場的基本武器,自然會有信心和方向感,然後再試著跨出這個舒適圈做下一次的突破。